One of the great fictional characters of all time… CHECK
Three unquestionably superb acting talents… CHECK
A collection of fantastic Arthur Conan Doyle stories to choose from… CHECK
A virtually unlimited Hollywood budget to work with… CHECK
Guy Ritchie to direct… OH FUCKING HELL! YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIDDING!
I think the reason that film critics universally despise Guy Ritchie movies is that most film critics are not pubescent morons obsessed with gimmicky action sequences, gratuitous slow-motion, cheap one-liners and flippant screenplays that are incapable of a moment’s sincerity. In fact, his reputation for churning out cinematic shite is now so rampant that I find it impossible not to endure his films without a sense of overwhelming pessimism.
Guy Ritchie is the undisputed, undefeated… WORST DIRECTOR IN THE WORLD!!! And if any of you disagree, let’s get ready to fuckin’ rumble!
Essentially, Ritchie has taken one of the most fascinating, elegant and intellectual characters ever created and reduced him to a cross between Benny Hill and Jean Claude Van Damme. This version of “Sherlock Holmes” is the dumbest idea in recent film history… even dumber than casting Madonna in a remake of “Swept Away”. It feels more like a sequel to “Transformers” than an homage to Doyle’s legendary detective.
This is a dreadful adaptation that will soon be forgotten by true Holmes enthusiasts. It is one of the very worst abominations of 2009. I expect nothing less from a director whose filmography has already reserved him a place on the Mount Rushmore of vile cinematic shit. He will be joined by Michael Bay, Jan de Bont and the fictional Alan Smithee.
